Are You Really "Yourself" When You're "Just Being Yourself?"
It's the advice we always hear, from pretty much everyone we know when we lament about not being able to get a girl. Be it from parents, siblings, friends, and even other girls, the advice is always the same:
Just be yourself!
I'm sure that just reading that line above caused a clenching in your stomach so fierce, you could barely keep the bile at bay. Those hated three words are commonly looked at as the most ineffective advice ever given to anyone wondering how to improve their love life.
The great Pick-Up Artist and PUA instructor Mystery, creator of the Mystery Method, has a saying: If being yourself never got you the results you wanted, why would you keep doing it and expect things to turn out differently?
In many respects, Mystery is dead on about this. If what you're doing doesn't work, why keep doing the same old thing and expect the results to be any different than what they were?
However, that being said, many of the best ladies men around ARE just being themselves when they go after women. They're congruent in everything they do -- what they wear, how they live, what they think, what they believe, etc. -- it's not a front. It's really them.
Which begs the question, does "being yourself" really work? I personally think it does. It has to. A woman can only be attracted to a facade for so long before she finds out who you really are. So if you want to attract a woman for the long haul, you really DO have to be yourself if you want to keep her.
I know what you're thinking. "But Thundercat, I've "been myself" around women all my life and it's never worked!"
Well, to those of you who ask that question, allow me to ask you this in response:
Are you really "yourself" when you're "just being yourself?"
