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I met this girl a few months ago at a bookstore, got her phone # and email and we talked a lot on email and on the phone. We have hung out twice and she invited me to her college apt this weekend. I hung out with her and her girlfriends. Later we watched a movie and we were sitting together on her bed, but I wasn't sure if I should've made the move and put my arm around her and kiss her. So, we just watched the movie and joked around a lot instead. Should've I made the move? Gosh I regret it now, but I wasn't sure what her vibe was with me cause she has guy friends, but no bf right now. When it was time to go we hugged and held hands, but that's it. Are these signs she likes me or is she just being friendly with me? I just don't want to mess up or think I'm going too fast with her. I had ex-gfs, but they made it obvious that they wanted it, but this lady is a good lady and I don't want to mess up.
 

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If the other peeps were there then IMO you did the right thing. No need to be embarrassed in front of a bunch of other peeps if things didn't go your way.

Go out solo with her next time to better focus on how she acts towards you w/o the pressure of other peeps around.

BTW: Do you think the other peeps were intentionally or unintentionally acting as chaperones for her?
 

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not sure man, she lives in a single dorm, but has a lot of dorm neighbor friends. i have a feeling she wanted to introduce me to them and her friends were judging me or something. gosh i hope i didn't give a bad impression :eek:
 

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Im sorta going threw the same right now as you are. Ive only hung out with girl in a group. She calls me alot and stuff. But when we are together i dont get the vibe from her that she wants me to make a move. I dont really want to f things up, so i havent yet. Ask her if she wants to go out alone. Thats what i want to do. But, its easier said then done. Im sorta pussy when it comes to hot girls.
 

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i actually was able to hang out with her alone tonight. ate dinner, talked, and then went to see a movie. we like to joke around a lot and we sat really close to each other in the theater, she put her on my shoulder, but i only got a long hug tonight, no kiss, oh well. i think i may have to ask her first like may i kiss u, i know its lame, but i think this is the only way.
 

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No dude, just do it. Its obvious that she wants it. Whats the worst that could happen. If she responds bad you just apalogize and tell her you thought thats what she wanted. When guys ask, thats the kind of thing girls talk about. Like "He actually asked to kiss you?" "how lame" Dont ask dude. If you ask her thats giving her the upper hand. You cant give them the upperhand or else they will walk all over you. Unless shes a really good girl.
 

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beemrmem3 said:
No dude, just do it. Its obvious that she wants it. Whats the worst that could happen. If she responds bad you just apalogize and tell her you thought thats what she wanted. When guys ask, thats the kind of thing girls talk about. Like "He actually asked to kiss you?" "how lame" Dont ask dude. If you ask her thats giving her the upper hand. You cant give them the upperhand or else they will walk all over you. Unless shes a really good girl.
Good advice :tu:
 

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taking it slow is the gentlemanly way to go!:tu:
sounds like she's diggin'/feelin' you... long hugs are always a good sign. i'm sure that shortly you two will kiss, and then you'll joke around about how scared you were to try.

you're scoring a lot of points with her and her friends, but you'll lose points with asking. just go for it!
 

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Discussion Starter #11
well, update is that we went out last saturday to dinner, she wanted to meet my folks who were there and then after dinner we went back to my place, slipped in a movie, watched a lunar eclipse cause it happened in chicagoland last weekend, walked outside, and then went back in and i made the move while watching tv. we kissed, cuddled, and joked around the rest of the night. then, we watched a simpsons episode cause i have season 3 on dvd. since then, we've talked on the phone almost everyday, but i couldn't hang out with her last night cause i have a bad flu and today she went downstate to visit her other college friends. well, that's it. i hope it will last. :)
 

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but what i would do invite her to your place, have a movie night and if you have a TV in your room or something just "cuddle" on the bed and make sure its comfortable nothing is worse than trying to be close and not being comfortable. and when your watching the movie dont talk just spoon her and be very gentlemaybe a kiss on the cheek or someting. but if she goes to sleep make sure to turn the volume down and sleep with her and just be reassuring with her. and another thing with these good girls be honest.

i think thats it
 

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I think this is excellent advice, Capn! Man, this is the stuff I need to be reminded of, and this is just what I was talking about when I said that you teach me. I knew comfort was important in relationships, but it's hard to remember that rule when you are so nervous and can't think of anything to talk about and that uncomfortable silence starts to kick in.

You are the man, Capn, and congratulations, 6thgenaccord.
 

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DoctorMuffn said:
I think this is excellent advice, Capn! Man, this is the stuff I need to be reminded of, and this is just what I was talking about when I said that you teach me. I knew comfort was important in relationships, but it's hard to remember that rule when you are so nervous and can't think of anything to talk about and that uncomfortable silence starts to kick in.

You are the man, Capn, and congratulations, 6thgenaccord.
heh i try Doc, and im just telling you guys whats been working for me. because somethings you have to rememebr

"silence speaks louder than words"

and be gentle, b/c women are a fickle thing so just take it easy
 

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Discussion Starter #18
DoctorMuffn said:
I think this is excellent advice, Capn! Man, this is the stuff I need to be reminded of, and this is just what I was talking about when I said that you teach me. I knew comfort was important in relationships, but it's hard to remember that rule when you are so nervous and can't think of anything to talk about and that uncomfortable silence starts to kick in.

You are the man, Capn, and congratulations, 6thgenaccord.
Well, thank you Doc
 
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